How to Know if a Friend Secretly Hates You

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You've been friends since forever so you lot can definitely experience when something'due south off with your friendship.

Despite this, you want to give them the do good of the doubtfulness. After all, what if they're merely going through something? Y'all're mature enough to know that friendships change with time.

Still, y'all tin can't shake off your suspicion that there'south more to it than that, and that perhaps he or she actually hates you!

To know for sure, pay attention if your friend does a lot of the things listed below.

37 signs your friend actually hates you lot

1) Y'all're the one reaching out all the damn time

You used to talk nonstop in person, through phone calls, through chats. Chatarama all day, every day! You lot shared even the simplest things such equally your boring lunch and your daily horoscopes.

If there'due south a ding on your phone, you kinda know it's them.

These days, however, they're talking less and less. The change was, of class, gradual. From daily to every other mean solar day, to weekly, to twice a calendar month. And gauge who'southward initiating those twice a calendar month catch ups? You, and only you.

2) They're not really excited to see you

You don't talk a lot online anymore and so you invite them for a quick catch upwardly, expecting that they'd be the same person you used to know when you finally meet again.

Of course, that doesn't happen.

For the past few dates that you initiated, they're late and they're in a rush to exit. They don't even have any excuses handy anymore.

They decline when you ask if they desire to have 1 more than beer or one more coffee. In fact, they continue checking their watch, more excited to leave than to meet you.

They could exist very decorated and stressed, and accept important things to heed, or maybe they just find it pointless to meet you if deep inside they hate you.

three) They don't like to open up anymore

Information technology has been ages since both of you opened upwardly to one another and shared your burdens. Now when yous ask them how well they're doing, they simply shrug and say "same former, same old."

Only you don't know how they're doing lately, and then you don't even know what they mean with "same old," so you press a bit more than. And then they go angry or push button you away, telling you to non be then nosey.

It'south like they have built a wall around themselves. Maybe they no longer trust you, or maybe they're trying to button you lot out so that they won't end upward hating you lot more.

iv) They can't take a joke anymore

You used to say stupid things and merely laugh about information technology. But now, even if yous just joke about something and so trivial like their selection of drink or the color of their shirt, they react every bit if y'all've committed an offense.

It'south sad when you can't joke around each other anymore because existence able to "insult" each other is an indication of closeness.

What have you done to deserve this? Everything used to be fine, but now it's like they recall y'all're a heartless stranger whose goal is to make them feel bad.

5) Your questions suddenly become offensive for them

When you ask "How'southward your relationship?", to them it sounds like you're asking "Why are you still together?"

When you ask "How's work?" to them it sounds like you're asking "Are you withal stuck in the aforementioned tedious job that pays so little?"

They don't brand it obvious that they're offended though. They don't want to show their weakness. Instead, you volition notice that their mood changes.

vi) They make you lot feel like you're clingy and demanding

You lot want to maintain your friendship because it's and then precious to yous. Naturally, y'all want to do things together.

They're non enthusiastic just y'all effort to attain out anyways. Inquire them what'southward upwardly and enquire if you could join them, but for them to snap at you and tell y'all that you lot're too demanding.

This might have merit if you've been trying to be with them every single mean solar day, and if you endeavour to make sure they're never doing annihilation without you.

But if it's been a while since you final reached out, that's no adept. That just means that your friend resents you lot on some level.

vii) They enjoy bullying you

They tin can't take a joke just they truly enjoy bullying you lot in forepart of everyone.

They'll laugh so hard when y'all're struggling and sometimes you wonder why they practise it now when they used to bully anybody else except yous.

Well then, you're not the exception anymore because your friend probably hates you at present. In fact, y'all might fifty-fifty be their favorite person to bully now if they truly hate you.

8) They get condescending

They want to belittle you lot every chance they get but they practice it in a funny-sarcastic tone so you have no right to be offended.

They volition give y'all a lecture on how y'all should handle your finances, and how y'all should break your bad habits.

They will curl their optics when you ask them about something you know nothing about, to remind you that you're kinda stupid.

9) They'd demand you to return the things y'all borrowed

You've always been generous to each other. You borrow each other's things, yous infringe coin from each other…you're like family unit!

But at present, they're asking those things back ASAP as if y'all're a bad friend for keeping their things. Your friend probably resents you and she shows her anger in these little ways.

10) They flirt with your crush

When your friendship was still great, at that place's no way that they'd go near your crush. If they'd make advances, you know your friend would run. Yous're BFFs!

But at present, although your friend doesn't actively pursue your beat out, he or she doesn't shoo your crush away either. It's as if your friend enjoys torturing you.

11) They're plainly pretending to like yous

The way they smile is different, the way they gush and congratulate you about your new job is unlike too. They feel…false!

It's as if they're not really who they are. They tin can't fool you because you've known each other since forever and that means you also know when they're being simulated.

Information technology can make you feel like there'due south something wrong with y'all but most of the time, the person who'south being a imitation is the one with problems.

12) They enjoy reminding you about your flaws

You're clumsy and you're working on getting amend. But instead of reassuring you, your friend always finds ways to remind you of your awkwardness, whether it'south by joking near it, grumbling most it, or fifty-fifty only pointing it out when you're talking to them.

They do it fifty-fifty when you're with other people, too. It's as if they do it for their own pleasure.

It gets worse if it's something more serious like if you have a drinking problem or the fact that yous are always getting in bad relationships or your ugly nose that you've always been insecure near.

A good friend knows you and therefore knows how to hurt you and that'south exactly what your "friend" is trying to do to you now.

xiii) They're not happy when you share adept news

While a friend in need is a friend indeed, the truthful test of friendship is when y'all share good news.

Real friends are truly happy for us when we get what we want—a great relationship, a job offering, an award of some sort. Those who harbor negative feelings towards u.s.a. can't exist happy when we share practiced news.

They'd call back "Merely they don't deserve it." or "what almost me?!"

Some are cool with your success every bit long equally you lot don't become more successful than them. The moment it's obvious that you're doing much better, they start to hate you. Your friend is mayhap one of those people.

14) They requite backhanded compliments

"Wow! I didn't wait you to win first prize. Adept for you!"

Or "Y'all look expert in your shirt. You should wearable information technology often!"

Backhanded compliments are "compliments" that are actually attacks and only someone who hates you would say those things.

Maybe they resent you for winning a prize or they want to make you experience insecure with how you look because everyone else praises yous. It's not like shooting fish in a barrel to do, but endeavour not to take their insults seriously.

They hate y'all so all they want to do is injure you.

15) They see you as a competition

This is probably the reason they hate yous, tbh.

Unless you did something admittedly awful in your friendship that caused them to hate you lot, the about likely reason is jealousy.

When nosotros're withal in our twenties, we're trying to find our identity and succeed in life. Of course, you can't help but compare each other'southward lives. We all do it.

The trouble is that they've taken it a bit too far. Y'all've get the villain in their story, and that usually gets stronger the more failures they encounter along their own path.

16) They're irritable AF

It'due south every bit if everything you lot do bothers your friend—y'all walk too boring or as well fast, or you chew your food the wrong style. The smallest things badger them!

They're always in a bad mood, and you thought that perchance they're just grumpy.

Simply information technology turns out it only happens when y'all're around. When they're with other people, they seem happy and bouncy. It'south almost as if being with you summons dark clouds above their heads.

This means that they have problems with y'all, even if they aren't aware of it. Mayhap y'all remind them of something they hate, or maybe your friend is jealous of you lot. Whatever the example, they simply don't feel too good when you're around.

17) They stopped greeting you on special occasions

It's Christmas and you haven't received a gift from them, and no greetings either. Maybe they're merely busy celebrating with family or perhaps they don't observe it necessary anymore.

The affair is…you used to greet each other on these days.

Every bit for your birthday? What's pitiful is that while they do greet you on your birthday, they practice information technology belatedly at night as if it's but an afterthought or something they practise out of duty.

18) They don't like your posts

You lot don't expect your friends—even your all-time friend—to like your every post but if they like other people's posts regularly and they haven't liked yours for a while, then something'due south up.

Sure, information technology's a complimentary country and we should not measure out our friendships through our social media interactions, but this is definitely ane sign that your friend secretly hates yous.

You see, if you're a true friend and you lot're always online, you would comment on the posts of your closest friends even if they're lame and a scrap too self-absorbed because hey…that's what friends do, especially if yous don't see each other often.

19) You disagree over near everything

Even something as simple as choosing what food to order becomes serious.

Most of the time, acrimony and resentment, when non expressed in a healthy way, finds its mode in simple everyday things.

They're not really pissed that you want to order something "too healthy", they're pissed that you're trying to show them how much more healthy and disciplined you are. For a friend who hates you, everything you say and practice becomes an assail of who they are as a person.

20) They put you in vulnerable situations

They know a lot about y'all and because of that, they accept the ability to comfort you…but also hurt you and put y'all in an embarrassing spot.

For example, they know you're bankrupt correct now but they'd insist that your friend grouping should go on a cruise. This would not only brand you compassion yourself a little, yous'll also exist forced to reveal your problems to the rest of the group.

Maybe your friend has completely forgotten the fact that you're flat broke (fifty-fifty if you told them a week ago), peradventure they're just impulsive, or maybe they did information technology out of spite.

21) They act too polite

Someone who's trying to agree dorsum their frustration and resentment volition act nice…sometimes, a bit besides nice. And if they are starting to really hate you, they'll get distant and polite.

This is especially obvious if y'all've e'er known them to be goofy and yet at present they treat yous like you're a invitee they simply met.

They're a unlike person at present. Too many formal words and gestures that it'southward equally if they're trying to establish the boundaries of your relationship.

22) They gaslight you

You lot know there'south something wrong between the 2 of you so try to bring it up.

Your convo goes like this:

Yous: "Hey, is there something wrong? You lot seem distant lately."

YOUR FRIEND: "Me? Afar? Of grade non!"

Y'all: Merely you rarely answer my letters."

YOUR FRIEND: "Of form, I practise. You're imagining things again!"

A friend who hates you would desire to stay in your life even if all they really want is to cut you off.

It's probably because they don't want to be "the bad friend." Considering of that, they'll put in little effort hoping you won't notice they've changed.

23) You silence is awkward

If you lot had problems that were just brushed under a rug, well that could pile upwards. And when that happens the problems get thicker and thicker… it could make being together awkward.

Simply let'south say that you lot tin can't think of a reason why they'd be pissed at you lot and yet, yous tin piece the uncomfortable silence with a knife, then information technology's probably because your friend at present hates yous.

If you're a highly sensitive person, you tin tell correct away when there'due south something off and you're catching on to these cues. Information technology'south ordinarily the body linguistic communication. Maybe they don't look you straight in the eye when they talk or they keep crossing and uncrossing their feet.

24) They've hidden you lot on social media

Alright, there'southward no way for you to find out for sure unless you lot inquire them outright, but then your gut tells yous that y'all're hidden. You just know!

And then there are more obvious signs similar when you see them actively posting and commenting on other people's posts, and they didn't fifty-fifty see your engagement posts with 1k likes.

If you know how social media works, yous know that it's impossible for them non to see your posts unless they've subconscious you.

At that place are probably other reasons milder than hate but they're probably rooting from the same vein.

25) You lot're no longer their go-to person

Yous used to be their number one person to telephone call in instance of emergency merely that's not the case anymore.

Heck, you oasis't even heard from them that much. Y'all run into their active condition on Whatsapp and however, crickets.

And well, y'all got news from your common friend about your friend'south latest dilemma. Basically, they told this person who they're not that close to only not you.

You used to be their hero, now you lot're zero real quick.

26) Yous don't be in their social media anymore

Y'all checked their profile because you lot remember they posted a photo of you together while you went hiking last summertime. You tin can't find it anymore. In fact, all the photos she posted that have you in information technology are gone.

Maybe you did something awful and they detest your stinking guts already. They're probably deeply hurt because only a person who's injure would bother doing that.

27) They show passive-ambitious behavior

So not only do they give backhanded compliments, they likewise show passive-aggressive behavior.

Passive aggression is a pattern of indirectly expressing negative feelings instead of openly addressing them.

Call up of the many ways you used to piss off your blood brother or classmate without really making it too obvious.

Possibly y'all walk a little slower just to annoy them, yous say something similar "I don't want to be rude" and say something and then rude because you lot already said the disclaimer.

28) They don't care if you become in trouble

They know that you go crazy when you're drunk but your friend merely allows you to make a complete fool of yourself.

You can tell they're dissimilar at present because they used to convince y'all to stop.

They used to exist protective of yous the same way you're protective of them. But things have changed and possibly because deep within, they hate you lot and want y'all to mess up.

29) They no longer drop everything to blitz to you

You know that you lot're non a needy person and the times that you truly need your friends are few and far between.

When you recently had a life and death state of affairs, your friend just observed from afar. They didn't blitz to you lot to go you out of the mess you lot got yourself into.

Certain nosotros're all decorated but this kind of thing doesn't usually happen and you wish they're there for you. Perchance they're at present besides focused on themselves or the friendship has changed because they secretly hate you.

30) They don't discover your jokes funny anymore

Yous might not be a critically acclaimed comedian, only they have always reacted in some way to even the blandest joke in your book.

But now they simply don't react at all. Or, when they do react, it's to make sure you get the idea that they hate yous.

Information technology could be that they would roll their optics, groan and tell y'all to stop, or but walk away. And you can just tell that in that location'south nothing friendly about information technology, either. They're not just pretending; it'southward real.

They know it would injure you. If they cared about yous, they would concord themselves back. But because they actually detest you, they would bound on the opportunity to make you feel bad.

31) They shut y'all downward when you ask for favors

Asking friends for favors feels bad. Or, at to the lowest degree almost people call up and so. At that place'southward that fright that you're existence too dependent on your friends, or that you lot're just taking advantage of them.

So all things considered, it's only correct to treat 1'due south friends nicely when they come to ask for a favor. Even when they tin't afford to entertain it at the moment (perchance they're busy), they would at to the lowest degree try to say 'no' nicely.

If they're shutting yous down without care for how you lot experience, and go far articulate that they don't want you asking for favors, and so they most likely hate y'all.

32) They're not proud of y'all

Information technology'south but natural to want to celebrate your victories with your friends. Later all, who doesn't like it when their friend is happy?

Not everyone might accept the emotional free energy to go on up, of course. And at that place are times when the news is not advisable. A friend who had just been dumped won't savour it when y'all tell them you just went steady with someone special.

But fifty-fifty then a friend won't try to put you down, and tell you things like "Simply that? That's non fifty-fifty a big bargain. Attempt harder."

A truthful friend would celebrate y'all and aid yous upward, not tear you down. And then who cares if your painting isn't as practiced as theirs, or that you learned how to do the plumbing yourself?

It's significant to you and they should recognise that.

33) They're non there on your everyman low

We all need company when things are peculiarly rough. During times when everything's falling apart and nosotros feel like nosotros accept nothing to live for.

And in those times, true friends would do their best to exist in that location for you.

They might not exist in that location in person, or be by your side all the fourth dimension, but they would nonetheless try to ask if you're alright. If you're doing fine. And if you are in danger, they would plough Heaven and Earth just to make sure you're safe.

The last matter they want is to lose a friend. Because that is a very existent danger in circumstances similar these.

But when you reach out for help and they leave you on read or elevate you even lower. When they don't respond despite how many times yous try to contact them, and so they most definitely don't care for you.

34) You hear almost them gossiping about you lot

Friendship is built on respect. And if yous respect someone, yous're not going to gossip about them or talk about them behind their back.

They might grinning at you lot and human action friendly to your face, but to laugh at you when your back is turned. They might try to engage you in pleasant conversation, only to twist your words and make y'all sound similar a monster when talking to others.

The trouble is that people can do this and still seem like the perfect friend to yous. It's not immediately obvious.

You volition have to wait for others to confess to y'all about what is going on behind your back, and then present damning show.

Only when you do become that evidence, you can be sure that they most certainly didn't like you. And if you got the show after you decided to stop being friends with them anyways, then you can rest assured that yous made the correct decision.

35) They keep trying to shift the arraign on you

Another sign that they actually hate yous is that they would keep trying to shift the blame on you or make things upwardly so that you'll feel bad.

The thing with people is that when we hate someone, we will always want to shift the blame towards them, even if we aren't sure they're to blame and even when we know they're innocent.

Permit'southward say that yous and your friends are out on an overseas trip to Peru and your grouping ends upwardly late to the flying, so your airplane leaves without you.

And without missing a beat they point at you and say that you missed the flight because yous slept in and spent too long in the shower… when the reason was that your taxi bankrupt down in the middle of the road.

36) They're not on your side anymore

Your best friend used to defend you fifty-fifty on the times when you lot're obviously incorrect. "That'southward what friends are for!," they say. And you never felt more loved and validated.

Lately, though, when you told them near your ex harassing you for cheating (considering you lot actually kinda did), your friend said "Well…he has a point." The erstwhile version of your friend would have said something like "Merely he shouldn't harass you! Call the cops!"

37) They befriend your enemies

Nosotros're not saints. There are some people we really hate with all our being. Your friend used to hate them too, simply considering you hate them. It's but how you show loyalty to each other.

But then, your friend is now starting to befriend your high school neat. It'south not similar they just take a quick chit chat because that's perfectly okay for you, only they're planning to go on a road trip together as if they're BFFs.

Let'south get existent. Your friend knows this hurts you… and that'due south probably why they're doing information technology.

Terminal words

Nosotros lose friends all the time, and it's ever a painful thing. But information technology's much improve to lose friends simply from losing contact than information technology is to come across them plow into an enemy.

Yous tin can yet salvage friendships that have turned sour and then long every bit you're willing to address the source of your disharmonize, and and so long every bit they're willing to give you a chance. It won't be easy, and information technology might take years.

But if the situation just can't be salvaged, it's best to shove them out of your head and focus on friends you lot still accept.

One solar day, in the future, you'll exist able to become real friends again.

Can a relationship coach assist you likewise?

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Source: https://hackspirit.com/signs-your-friend-actually-hates-you/